Knowing He was facing a crucifixion, He wanted to be bolstered up by the Disciples love and care. A little holy TLC was needed. But, that He did not get. Their trivial and trite conversations and questions to Him revealed how clueless they were to the pain in Jesus' Heart. They didn't even realize He was saying goodbye. Oi, vey! Jesus' compassionate Heart must have been aching for He was also concerned for those He would leave behind. Oh, how He had to trust His Father for their future care. I understand, Lord, I feel as You must have then.
Jesus faced what He did, solo. Yep, all alone. And you know, even though surrounded by loved ones, each one of us goes through life solo. Individually, we must make our own decisions, face the heartache of tribulations, and get through the storms of life. Yes, others can have compassion and empathy, others can give us their opinions, but ultimately the decisions are ours alone. Ultimately, no one can know our pain. No one truly understands the complexity of heart and mind in certain situations. As individually unique as we all are, so are our responses to life's tribulations, changes, and heartaches. Only our God knows and understands completely.
Oh, LORD, forgive me for the times when I've expected others to respond as I would; to feel as I would; to love as I would. Forgive me for the angst it causes within me when I think I'm not understood. And You know I hate goodbyes. I've been saying them my whole life.
"So, what's one more, Diane? All the past "goodbyes" prepared you for this one. I have not left you ill-equipped. Yes, My Daughter, you love deeply as I do, you pour into others as I do. Afterall, you are your Father's Daughter. This is just one more goodbye. You can do this. Cry on My Shoulder when needed. I am here."Thank You, my Abba, thank You!
(PS: My story, Forgiveness Rendered, is about my very first goodbye on my life's journey. And it was traumatic! Life-altering traumatic. Maybe that is why goodbyes are so painful to me. Oh, LORD, my God, please let me have no regrets at these goodbyes. Give me courage and strengthen my inner man to do and say everything I desire to. Thank You, LORD.)
Because of Him and Unto Him,